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Photo partially from Aubrie Pick, Chron, and Cozys

A Teetotaler's Guide To 'Drinking' In San Francisco

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Teetotalers, or those who don't drink alcohol, can be a confusing lot. They have no beer guts. They never get hangovers. And they sometimes drink...mocktails. Let's pause and take a moment for the permanent or temporary teetotalers out there. Proving that San Francisco has much more to offer than syrupy sweet Shirley Temples, and embarrassingly named mocktails, we give you A Teetotaler's Guide To 'Drinking' In San Francisco: a map to excellent non-alcoholic beverages, available in drinking establishments across San Francisco.


--Chloe Schildhause

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Note: Restaurants on this map are listed geographically.

Ken Ken Ramen's Hot Zombie

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At Ken Ken Ramen, bartender Charles Papillo makes The Hot Zombie ($6), a combination of mango juice, orange juice, habañero infused lemonade, and açaí juice, finished off with sparkling water.

Blackbird's Arkansas Black Apple Shrub

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The drink menu at Blackbird just says “mocktail,” but Bartender Matt Grippo mixes clever and seasonally customized combinations for the sober folks. Take his autumn mixture of Arkansas black apple shrub, maple syrup, acid phosphate and lemon ($5). The first few sips give a slight burn, then the maple leaves a lingering sweet note behind.

Millennium's Raw-Volution

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Millennium has its own non-alcoholic beverage menu, and a terrific one at that. The drink that stands out most is the Raw-Volution ($7), a mix of kombucha, ginger agave, lemon juice, and fresh muddled fruit—like pineapple, chamomile and rose, on a recent visit.

Twenty Five Lusk's Spa Water

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For those who are not into overly sweet or spicy beverages, the Spa Water ($5) at 25 Lusk is refreshing and light. Made with grapefruit, cucumber lemon, lime, and a touch of mint, it’s a sober take on their popular SF Yacht Club cocktail. 25 Lusk also makes seasonal mocktails every Sunday for brunch: most recently one with pumpkin puree.

Outerlands' Hot Ginger-Apple Cider

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Outerlands' warm and spicy ginger lemon apple cider ($4) pairs well a gooey grilled cheese, and its foggy Outer Sunset location.

Bar Tartine's Quince-Whey Soda

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This bubbly quince-whey soda has a slightly pithy texture from the quince, which mixes well with the taste of sweet honey.

Txoko's The Simpson

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O.J. Simpson's knickname was "The Juice," and that's where Txoko's The Simpson ($4.50) gets its name. The drink is made from freshly squeezed sparkling O.J., housemade grenadine, and pomegranate for a sweet, tart sip that's bright orange enough to conjure the other Simpsons: Bart and Lisa.

Beretta's Rattlesnake Sans Rye

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Any of the cocktails at Beretta can be made sans alcohol, but the recommended beverage is The Rattlesnake ($5). Its mixture of lemon, maple and egg whites makes for a lightly frothy beverage that still shines without rye.

The Ice Cream Bar's New Orleans Hangover

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Originally created for people with post-drinking headaches, the New Orleans Hangover mixes chicory coffee syrup and sweet cream ice cream, and it makes a great sober indulgence too.

Little Baobab

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The hot ginger tea at Little Baobab is a serious punch of ginger spice that is not Geri Halliwell—for ginger enthusiasts who need something strong. The beverage pairs well with the restaurant's curries, and is also helps soothe a sore throat.

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Ken Ken Ramen's Hot Zombie

At Ken Ken Ramen, bartender Charles Papillo makes The Hot Zombie ($6), a combination of mango juice, orange juice, habañero infused lemonade, and açaí juice, finished off with sparkling water.

Blackbird's Arkansas Black Apple Shrub

The drink menu at Blackbird just says “mocktail,” but Bartender Matt Grippo mixes clever and seasonally customized combinations for the sober folks. Take his autumn mixture of Arkansas black apple shrub, maple syrup, acid phosphate and lemon ($5). The first few sips give a slight burn, then the maple leaves a lingering sweet note behind.

Millennium's Raw-Volution

Millennium has its own non-alcoholic beverage menu, and a terrific one at that. The drink that stands out most is the Raw-Volution ($7), a mix of kombucha, ginger agave, lemon juice, and fresh muddled fruit—like pineapple, chamomile and rose, on a recent visit.

Twenty Five Lusk's Spa Water

For those who are not into overly sweet or spicy beverages, the Spa Water ($5) at 25 Lusk is refreshing and light. Made with grapefruit, cucumber lemon, lime, and a touch of mint, it’s a sober take on their popular SF Yacht Club cocktail. 25 Lusk also makes seasonal mocktails every Sunday for brunch: most recently one with pumpkin puree.

Outerlands' Hot Ginger-Apple Cider

Outerlands' warm and spicy ginger lemon apple cider ($4) pairs well a gooey grilled cheese, and its foggy Outer Sunset location.

Bar Tartine's Quince-Whey Soda

This bubbly quince-whey soda has a slightly pithy texture from the quince, which mixes well with the taste of sweet honey.

Txoko's The Simpson

O.J. Simpson's knickname was "The Juice," and that's where Txoko's The Simpson ($4.50) gets its name. The drink is made from freshly squeezed sparkling O.J., housemade grenadine, and pomegranate for a sweet, tart sip that's bright orange enough to conjure the other Simpsons: Bart and Lisa.

Beretta's Rattlesnake Sans Rye

Any of the cocktails at Beretta can be made sans alcohol, but the recommended beverage is The Rattlesnake ($5). Its mixture of lemon, maple and egg whites makes for a lightly frothy beverage that still shines without rye.

The Ice Cream Bar's New Orleans Hangover

Originally created for people with post-drinking headaches, the New Orleans Hangover mixes chicory coffee syrup and sweet cream ice cream, and it makes a great sober indulgence too.

Little Baobab

The hot ginger tea at Little Baobab is a serious punch of ginger spice that is not Geri Halliwell—for ginger enthusiasts who need something strong. The beverage pairs well with the restaurant's curries, and is also helps soothe a sore throat.

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